How strong is the memory of a moment in pain (physical or psychological) having you seeking the hug or the touch of a loved one? How about a memory from your childhood seeking out the comfort in the touch of one of your parents? The energy you find in such a touch is the result of real love, unconditional trust  and genuine care.

For those in the lifestyle with some experience all these sound so similar to the aftercare. The moment your Master approaches you with a soft touch and a loving hug. It is exactly when he is expressing his love for you in full. But it is not only love that he will express, it is also a way to show you how grateful he is for the gift of submission by his girl.

I wrote so many times about this gift because it is so important for all to understand submission is not just a word. It is not just an act of a protocol dictating how to behave. It is not even a matter of superiority or inferiority. It is exactly like a woman offering her kiss to a man in the vanilla world only in our lifestyle it is a lot deeper, a lot more meaningful and a lot harder. Submission is a gift and it should always be out of love in my way of thinking.

It doesn’t really matter if it is just discipline, power exchange, bondage or spanking what you practice. Anything you are into makes no difference at all. Even if you are into genuine S/M again the rule is the same. What offered to you is a gift and the aftercare is a pure expression of love. Your touch as a Master might be a touch of pain, of agony, of distress but at the end it has to turn into a touch of love, comfort care and unity. A moment that you may even end up making love in a vanilla way.

Don’t be afraid of your vanilla side, it is there, we all have one. Embrace it and accept it as it is the one who will define your Master/submissive side, it will help your other side be identified and flourish.

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