Secretary_Soundtrack

Many people learned about the lifestyle because of the 50 shades and in fact consider everything in that book how the real life experience is. Before that book there was a movie in 2002 that is simply amazing and according to my opinion describes the lifestyle a lot better. The secretary. The link will send you to IMDB though I will include some information here as well. James Spader is the Dom of the story named….. GREY!!!! Hey does this sound familiar? Is it a coincidence? His acting is brilliant same as Maggie Gyllenhaal in the role of the submissive. Steven Shainberg, the producer, stated that he wished to show that BDSM relationships can be normal and was inspired by the film My Beautiful Laundrette, which he feels normalized gay relationships for audiences in the 1980s

So yes this is a movie that try to bring the lifestyle forward making a point. The point that BDSM relationship are as any other love relationship in this world with its own rules and dynamics. In fact what we realise as we watch the movie is that both characters find their selves within the lifestyle and through their relationship. First, the secretary who is ignorant of her submissive side. She learns about it because of Grey’s behaviour. Up to some point we feel like Gray has a full self awareness but then we see him break. We see that he can’t believe that he can be loved for what he is. He is afraid of his own desires that he will actually end up hurting his love. We see in fact a relationship that each one discovers new things through the presence of the other. Happened to any of you? I know it did if you are in the lifestyle.

The producer in a very clever way makes the point that all happens because it is the submissive who desire to submit. She is kneeling because she want it, she loves it not because she is forced into it. From changing her style to end up sitting a couple of days in his office just to prove her desire for him. She was sent away and from that point she found out that nothing feels the same without him. I love the scene when she is trying self spanking in her bath. It makes you realise (as does her character), it is not the pain of the spank that she loves. She loves the spank to be from her Dom. The Dom she loves is giving her pleasure not the spank as an activity. We don’t spank for the sake of spanking.

I am not trying to make a complete analysis of the film here as I would suggest you to watch it and ponder on what you will see. There three strong point in  the movie though that I have to mention them. No matter what society considers and identify as normality, it is our body and our choice how we use it as long as it SSC. A point made clear when her father states that you should do what you wish with your body.

The second point is how she feels beautiful for first time in her life. She can see her beauty for first time through his eyes, his love and the relationship they created. A scared woman as she appears and the first scenes, afraid of life, for first time is free of all her fears just because she found what she needed. She found a world of beauty because it is her world, her choice. The third point that we see is the normality a BDSM couple have. We see them married, having a life as any other couple. But still she misbehaves just to make him “punish” her as any submissive would do to get her spanking session.

With the upcoming 50 shades movie, I would strongly suggest you watch this movie that is a lot more educating about the lifestyle than what I expect the Shades will be.

2 thoughts on “The Secretary – A BDSM movie

  1. I’ve seen this movie a few times…it’s a hot one. Thanks for the idea to watch again. I’ll take notes

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s